Confidence, defined in the most clinical sense, is the ability to perform an action with an acute understanding of the outcome. Therefore, confidence is an extremely varied topic because it takes specific knowledge within specific fields to generate unique types of confidence.
For instance, confidence driving an automobile is achieved by heightening one’s knowledge about road rules, vehicle operation, problem solving, defensive driving, and so forth.
A 17 year-old may have very little confidence behind the wheel. But, as years pass, they become adept and much more proficient. Then, they can drive without the paranoia of intersections and being run over.
A brain surgeon who is a veteran of hundreds of surgeries may perform seemingly remarkable feats to the outside world, but to him…it’s just routine procedure.
Knowledge based confidence is therefore a result of skill and practice. When you understand a subject in its near entirety, it can performed in a way that makes others feel impressed by your expertise, but to you…it’s not a big deal.
Unlikely Topics You Can Become Knowledgeably Confident About
To obtain knowledge based confidence, it must typically be something that can be practiced and demonstrated. You’d be surprised the topics that you can become extremely confident at:
– Social Skills: This is a big one. Social skills are things you can practice, and learn. A lack of social confidence is almost immediately noticeable, and vice versa.
– Conflict: You can become very confident at handling conflict. Most people try to avoid conflict, or are otherwise scared of negative feelings in general. But people who deal with conflict every-day, such as police officers, navigate such situations with ease.
– Relaxation: People who practice meditation frequently, and learn how to unwind from tense situations, become much more skilled at relaxing. And thus, it’s possible to become confident in one’s abilities to transcend.
– Economics: Some are very confident at being rich, while others feel that the money is burning a hole in their pockets. Some are also very confident at being poor, and can navigate the pitfalls associated with poverty.
– Sex: Many cite confidence in the bedroom as an important quality in a mate, and like anything—sex can be practiced, honed, and developed with confidence.
– Grief: Even the act of grieving can be managed with study and personal growth. Whether recovering from breakups or deaths, some people become devastated for years, while others can more quickly return to their normal, enjoyable lives.
To name just a few.
The important point here is that whatever your weakness is, often the most important thing is to train yourself and become more knowledgeable about it, until you can perform it with confidence. Here is a three-step process:
– Identify: Figure out what you’re lacking at, and then identify what specific, practicable skill-set is related to your unconfident feeling, and how it can be honed.
– Implement: Figure out a training program to enhance your ability, and incorporate it into your schedule.
– Patience: Obtaining a sense of confidence may take weeks or months. Think about how long it took for you to become great at driving cars. The point is to keep practicing until you feel certain of yourself.
Create Actionable Steps
The key to obtaining confidence in your abilities is, obviously, practicing constantly. The trickiest part of mastering a skill is going through the “pain period”, where you are not very confident, you question your abilities, and perhaps feel self-conscious to perform.
As we’ll talk about later, the idea of being “alpha” generally means stepping up to the plate, as a leader, as frequently as possible. Assuming a role of an alpha means being willing to assign yourself to uncomfortable pain periods for the purpose of self-growth.